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Written here is the full transcript of the episode "Fluttering Finger Mindslip" from the Nickelodeon television series Kung Fu Panda: Legends of Awesomeness. This transcript has been separated into three segments, indicated accordingly to the episode's commercial breaks.
Character dialogue lines were originally written by the episode's screenwriter, Jessica Gao. Descriptions shown between italicized brackets were written by contributors of this article.
[The episode opens up with Crane, Monkey, and Viper eating dumplings in the dining hall. Po arrives with a crate full of scrolls.]
PO: Now, make way, gents! [Places the scrolls on the table] Time to start reading the sacred scrolls. Finally I get to learn the good stuff: secret moves, magic defenses. Now, [Grabs a scroll] scroll number one! [Opens the scroll] How to make tea... aww! [Po lays his head on the table out of frustration. He notices Monkey's dumplings.] Oh, you gonna eat that?
MONKEY: Yes... [Po snatches a dumpling.] Hey! Get your own!
PO: Monkey, I'm doin' you a favor. Cheeks are lookin' a little jowly. [Monkey grunts.] Aww, I can't read about tea all day! Maybe I can just skip ahead a scroll or two. Ooh, scroll number twenty-three mastering the eye-gouge. [ Shifu arrives and Viper makes a humming sound to warn Po that he is standing behind him.]
SHIFU: Po, [Po turns to Shifu.] the sacred scrolls must be read in the proper order.
PO: Can't I just skip to, you know, number fifty [Pulls out a scroll.]; invisible sneak attacks, with your mind!
SHIFU: Of course not. [Puts the scroll back with his cane.] You need the knowledge of scrolls one through forty-nine to understand the importance of fifty.
PO: [Looks to a bowl of dumplings and slowly puts his hand to it.] How 'bout I skim one through forty-nine huh?
SHIFU: [Smacks Po's hand and kicks the the crate of scrolls onto him, making him fall.] No, you will take these scrolls to the library and read them all start to finish, without distractions. No skipping, no skimming, no shortcuts.
PO: Um, don't ya' think that'll kinda, you know, take all the fun out of it?
SHIFU: Yes. [Drops one last scroll in the crate.]
[Meanwhile Taotie hammers a nail into a mechanism at his residence.]
TAOTIE: [Laughs] Oh yes, and when we stormed off in my contraption it sent a clear message to those spasmodic goons at the Jade Palace; mechanical always beats Kung Fu. [The contraption closes on Taotie.]
BIAN ZAO: We lost that battle.
TAOTIE: Correction: [Gets out of the contraption.] seems like we lost. Did you see the look on their faces?
BIAN ZAO: No because we were running away!
TAOTIE: Well you should've looked because they were utterly terrified, that was the victory. They will never again toy with the fury of Taotie! [A mailman approaches Taotie with a scroll.] Oh the mail. [Opens the scroll.] Aha, the Jade Palace, what'd I tell ya'? [Examines the scroll.] A bill, for the destruction of the Training Hall! [Drops the scroll.] A bill! [Yells to the nearby hills.] Enough of your petty humiliation Shifu and friends! I'll make you rue the day you were ever born! Rue do ya' hear me? Rue!
BIAN ZAO: Dad, they're like four miles away.
[Meanwhile, in the Jade Palace Hall of Warriors, Po stands in front of a row of scrolls on a table.]
PO: [Picks up a scroll and reads it.] Besides tea, herbs can be used to make tiny decorative scented soaps. Tiny decorative scented soaps. Wow, that has to be the [Yells.] most exciting thing I've ever learned. [Throws the scroll.] No, can't fake it, still boring. [Picks up another scroll and gasps.] This looks awesome! [Looks around, then dumps all the other scrolls off of the table and lays out only the one.] So that's how you block the Fists of Fury! [Gasps.] Oh, you can do that with chopsticks?! [Moves up the scroll.] The Fluttering Finger Mindslip if [Viper arrives and approaches Po.] done correctly erases the short-term memory of its victim. [Performs the moves with his hand as he reads them.] Swirl to the left, swirl to the right, flutter the fingers in a twisting motion and... [Viper gets in front of his mindslip and is affected.] This can't be good!
VIPER: [Remains silent for a few seconds and then begins speaking.] Oh, hey Po I came to tell you that... uh, that... uh... Huh, I can't remember. Must not have been important. [Leaves.]
PO: [Flutters his hand.] Whoa!
[Po picks up the scroll and continues reading it. Crane arrives so Po hides the scroll behind his back.]
CRANE: Po, it's your turn to sweep the barracks, and this time don't just wait for the wind. I coughed up dust for [Po does the mindslip.] weeks a... What was I saying?
PO: You were saying that you really wanted to sweep even though it's my turn. [Chuckles.] But you know what? I'm 'onna let you do it, since you're a pal.
CRANE: Wow, thanks that really nice of you to let me sweep... [Crane realizes something is wrong but continues to go sweep.]
PO: [Flutters his hand.] This really works! [Throws the scroll back in the pile and exits the Hall of Warriors.]
[In the Training Hall courtyard Tigress balances on a log. Po comes with several spears. He approaches a stand and drops the spears on it in an unorganized fashion.]
TIGRESS: Po don't be lazy. [Approaches Po.] You're the Dragon Warrior. The title carries great honor and great [Po mindslips Tigress.] responsibili-ty... What was I saying?
PO: Uh, tea. You said you were going to make yourself some tea, and you asked if I'd like some too.
TIGRESS: O-kay... [Walks away.]
PO: Tigress is making me tea!
TIGRESS: With honey?
PO: Surprise me!
[Inside the Training Hall, Monkey practices on the machines with a bamboo stick. After defending against some clubs, he jumps to the pit, throws the stick and pulls out a sword. The sword blade falls off.]
MONKEY: Aww, Po!
[Po lays in the Jade Tortoise of Wisdom with a bowl of dumplings. Monkey jumps onto the rim of the tortoise.]
MONKEY: [Po mindslips Monkey as he speaks.] Were you playing with my sword again?
PO: Whoa, Monkey you broke your sword.
MONKEY: Oh, I guess I... Yeah I broke my sword. Well, see you at lunch! [Leaves.]
PO: This is so cool.
MANTIS: Po, how many times have I told you not to use my bow staff as a toothpick [Po mindslips Mantis.]?!
PO: I uh, found your bow staff for you.
MANTIS: Oh uh, thank you.
[ In the kitchen, Tigress approaches Po with a spoon and bowl.]
TIGRESS: Po, were you... [Po mindslips Tigress.]
[Po plays with action figures in his room.]
CRANE: Are you... [Po mindslips Crane.]
[Monkey holds a jar as Po passes by him.]
MONKEY: Have you... [Po mindslips Monkey.]
[Mantis lays crushed on the ground.]
MANTIS: Did you... [Po mindslips Mantis.]
[Throughout the day, Po mindslips each of the Furious Five again.]
[Po walks down the barracks hallway.]
PO: This is so great, they can't blame their beloved panda for anything. [Walks into the Dining Hall, where the five are.] Hey everybody!
[The five look at Po strangely and then take defensive positions toward him.]
TIGRESS: Who are you?!
PO: What do ya' mean?
MANTIS: State your name and your business.
PO: Po, panda.
MONKEY: What are you doing in our barracks?!
PO: What are you... it's me Po!
VIPER: [Smacks Po.] Take that Me-Po!
TIGRESS: Come on guys, looks like this stranger wants to rumble.
PO: Wait, no!
[End of Act 1]
[Po is lying down, bewildered.]
[The five begin attacking Po with plates.]
PO: Whoa! [Runs to the corner. He dodges several plates and then gets hit in the head by one.] Hey, I'm Po! We're friends! You know, the Dragon Warrior.
MONKEY: [Hangs from a support beam.] Don't be ridiculous! [Kicks Po.] Oogway hasn't chosen a Dragon Warrior yet.
TIGRESS: [Approaches Po.] And if he did it'd be one of us not some flabby panda. [Hold up her paw to strike Po.]
PO: Hey! [Quickly holds up a chair and blocks Tigress' hits.] Yeah, well the universe is funny that way.
[Po fends off the five with the chair. He throws Tigress, then dodges Viper. Tigress comes around to fight Po and Crane gets in front of him. Po jumps to a support beam where Monkey is. Monkey knocks off Po and Po bounces up behind Monkey, knocking him off. Po blocks strikes from each of the five with the chair. Viper gets tangled in the chair. Po flips the chair and gets Crane's head stuck in it. Mantis kicks towards Po and flattens against the chair. Monkey and Tigress then get stuck in the chair. Po throws the five off the chair. Mantis lands on the table.]
MANTIS: Whoa, where'd this guy come from, he's got some serious skills!
PO: Mantis it's Po, [Punches Monkey.] Po, Po, [Punches Crane.] Po! Funny, loveable, sharp dresser. Nothing?
[Tigress punches Po.]
PO: Ow! Tigress we're friends! You don't attack me!
TIGRESS: Then why does it feel so right?!
PO: Well you usually want to attack me, but you hold back!
[The five take positions around Po.]
CRANE: He can't take all of us at once. On three, one...
[Each of the five lunge at Po. Po mindslips each of the five and they fall. Po walks away, leaving the five confused.]
MONKEY: Hey, you with the uh, face, do you know who I am?
TIGRESS: No idea. Wait, could you be uh... Monkey?
MONKEY: No, I am a Monkey, so obviously my name can't be Monkey, right?
VIPER: Oh my gosh, where are my legs?!
CRANE: Calm down, I think you're a snake.
VIPER: Oh... Oh my gosh, I'm a snake?!
CRANE: I couldn't stand it if my name were just what kind of animal I am. I need a name with real panache.
MANTIS: Ooh, how about... bunny... cup... hat? Does that mean anything? Are those real words?!
[Po peeks in and gets worried.]
PO: [Runs through the Hall of Warriors.] Ah, not good, not good! This is the worst thing I've ever done! [Stops.] Well, top five. [Starts running.] I've gotta make them remember me or I'm gonna lose my friends for ever. [Jumps into a pile of scrolls and searches frantically.] Where did I put that scroll? Nope, grocery list. Nope. Nope! Ooh, [Looks at a scroll.] spicy broth noodle recipe. Focus Po, Focus! [Continues searching, throwing scrolls everywhere.] Nope, Nope! Where is it?!
SHIFU: How is the studying coming panda? [Opens one of Po's tossed scrolls.] Have you learned anything new?
PO: [Stops searching.] Uh, about that. [Gets out of the pile of scrolls.] So uh, it's possible, maybe, that I might have uh...
PO: Uh, sorta...
PO: Accidentally... used the Fluttering Finger Mindslip a few dozen times on the Furious Five and now they don't remember me or anything!
SHIFU: What?! [Turns toward Po.]
PO: And I think I lost the scroll I learned it from.
SHIFU: Do you know what this means?! [Po begins mindslipping Shifu.] PO!
PO: Ah ah! I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to do that. It was all, reflex-y. [Shifu stares at Po blankly, dropping his cane. Shifu acts normal again.] Uh, hey Shifu, how's it uh... So, to sum up I just told you I erased the five's memory with the Fluttering Finger Mindslip that I learned from a scroll that I lost.
PO: Then, you punished me and I learned a valuable lesson.
SHIFU: I punished you?
PO: Yes, very severely, I hated it, a lot. Wow, you're some master. [Bows to Shifu and laughs nervously.] Any who, here we are, fixing the problem, without anger.
SHIFU: Hmm, there must be an antidote. We have to search the Cave of Mysteries.
PO: The Cave of Mysteries. That sounds awesome! [Shifu stares at Po blankly.] And serious, super, super serious.
[The two begin leaving the Hall of Warriors. At the base of Jade Mountain the Furious Five look up at the Jade Palace.]
VIPER: Hey, I think we might live there.
MANTIS: It's pretty sweet! Are we voting on living there, 'cause, I vote yes.
[Monkey rubs a nearby rock.]
CRANE: Have you guys seen this? My knees totally bend the wrong way! Is this normal?!
[Crane grabs Monkey to get his attention. Monkey attacks Crane, sending him towards Tigress. Tigress attacks Crane and then choke slams him. Crane looks at Tigress, stunned. Tigress eases up.]
TIGRESS: Hmm, judging by our fighting skills, we must be bakers.
MONKEY: Yes, very dangerous bakers.
MANTIS: Well, I'm going inside, dibs on the big bedroom!
[The five walk up the long staircase to the Jade Palace. From a distant hill, Taotie looks at the five walking up the mountain through a spyglass.]
TAOTIE: Revenge will be mine! They shall be easy targets, frozen with fear, once they get a taste of my Flying Bamboo Bird of Incalculable Retribution! [Laughs.] Okay Bian Zao, start peddling.
BIAN ZAO: I know how to drive a giant bamboo bird dad, I'm not an idiot.
TAOTIE: I'm not saying you're... Can we just not do this now? Can we please just destroy the Furious Five and save the bickering for later?
BIAN ZAO: I don't know, can we?
[The bird begins flying clumsily around the hill.]
TAOTIE: Depress the clutch. Did you depress the clutch?!
[The bird stops in midair and falls. The five arrive at the Jade Palace. Taotie and Bian Zao begin descending towards the palace.]
TAOTIE: They're gonna lose it when they see me, Taotie, their arch nemesis. [The bird crashes into the palace and the two fall in front of the five. Taotie lands upside down.] Furious Five! [The five stair at Taotie, confused.] First you delude yourselves with false victory, [Gets up.] then you have the audacity to send me a bill! [The five remain confused.] Taotie.
CRANE: Is that your name or an animal?
[Taotie becomes confused. Down in the cave of mysteries, Po and Shifu arrive. Po hold a torch.]
SHIFU: Behold, scrolls fifty-one through ten-thousand.
PO: Ten-thou... We have to read through ten-thousand scrolls? ["Scrolls" echoes down the corridor.] Can't we just skip to the last one?
SHIFU: [Elbows Po.] The shortest path does not necessarily lead to the correct destination. We start at fifty-one.
PO: Okay, okay.
[Shifu hands Po the scroll. Po reads the scroll.]
SHIFU: Alright, settle in panda. This could take...
PO: Found it.
SHIFU: Let me see that. [Takes the scroll.] If you mindslip someone repeatedly, their memories will begin to deteriorate on their own, until they can't even remember how to breath. [Stops reading.] We have less than an hour to reverse it.
PO: But how?!
SHIFU: The mindslip can be drawn out by covering the head with clay from the Alabaster Pot of Remembrance. [Closes the scroll.] Oh...
SHIFU: The Alabaster Pot of Remembrance can only be retrieved by traveling down the Corridor of Unbelievable Agony.
PO: [Pauses.] What's with all the long names?
SHIFU: Let's go. [Begins walking.]
PO: No Shifu, [Stops Shifu.] this was my mistake, I must be the one to face the Corridor of Unbelievable Agony.
SHIFU: Of course you're facing it. I'm just going to show you where it is.
[The two continue on until they come to a long dark corridor.]
SHIFU: [Stops Po.] This is it. All that lays between you and the Pot, is fifty feet of incredible pain. [Hands Po a scroll.] This scroll explains how to do it.
PO: [Opens the scroll, revealing it to be extremely long.] Aw, do I have to read all of this?!
SHIFU: Yes! I'll go make sure the Furious Five don't wander off. Good luck. [Leaves.]
PO: I can just skim it, right?
SHIFU: No! (Echoes)
[Po's torch goes out, leaving him in the dark. Back at the Hall of Warriors, Taotie remains confused by the five's condition.]
TAOTIE: What is it with you people? You don't know me? [The five stare at Taotie, blankly.] How do you not remember me?!
BIAN ZAO: No seriously how? I need to forget him too.
VIPER: Wait, if you expected us to know who you are, you must know who we are. It's a good thing we bumped into you.
TAOTIE: Yes, yes i-it is a good thon, an excellent thing because um, I am Taotie, your Kung Fu Master.
FURIOUS FIVE: [Bow to Taotie.] Master Taotie.
TAOTIE: [Laughs and begins naming the five. Points at Viper.] You, you're Noodle. [Points at Monkey.] You're Doodie. [Points at Mantis.] Little Britches. [Points at Tigress.] Whiskers-Kitty-Poo. [Points at Crane.] And El Storko. [Laughs.]
BIAN ZAO: [Coughs.] Loser...
CRANE: We have so many questions master.
TIGRESS: Tell us who we are. Where do we come from?
TAOTIE: Oh, uh, yes, well my students.
[A 2-D animated sequence begins.]
TAOTIE (V.O.): You've been my pupils for as far back as anyone can remember.
[The five bow to Taotie, who stands on a platform above them.]
TAOTIE (V.O.): I trained you in my special Kung Fu, [The five take defensive positions.] using my incredible machines, [Machines start landing around as the scenery turns into a tournament area.] Which every one in the valley was really impressed with.
[A crowd surrounds the area. The crowd holds up Taotie.]
TAOTIE (V.O.): They called me a brilliant genius.
MANTIS (V.O.): Uh, isn't this supposed to be about us?
TAOTIE (V.O.): Right, sorry.
[The crowd swaps out Taotie for the Furious Five.]
TAOTIE (V.O.): But then [The crowd turns there attention to something else.] at the peak of- of my... Our glory, there arose a terrible menace.
[The camera slowly pans up a large dark figure that's destroying things.]
TAOTIE (V.O.): A dark lord of evil known as [The figure is revealed to be a clueless-looking Shifu.] Shifu...'s-An-Idiot. Yeah Shifu's-An-Idiot.
[A large figure comes behind the mountains and parts them.]
TAOTIE (V.O.): And his nefarious confederate, Po...-Chews-With-His-Mouth-Open.
BIAN ZAO (V.O.): Lame!
[Taotie snaps his fingers and the five go to attack. The fictional Po and Shifu go into the valley and start destroying things by stomping on them and shooting them with laser beams from their eyes.]
TAOTIE (V.O.): And although we have defeated them at every turn, Shifu's-An-Idiot and Po keep coming back.
[Shifu slams his fist on some approaching catapults, and Taotie comes toward him with a kick, knocking him down.]
TAOTIE (V.O.): By the way, last time we fought those guys, I saved your lives, so you should be really nice to me. And then also there was a giant cake with eyes or whatever...
[A giant cake appears and does nothing. End of 2-D animation.]
TAOTIE: The end.
'MANTIS: I think I remember that cake!
TAOTIE: Anyway, point being, you do whatever I say.
[Shifu arrives at the Hall of Warriors.]
TAOTIE: Get him!
[The five lunge at Shifu and pin him.]
SHIFU: What is the meaning of this?!
TIGRESS: Save your breath Shifu's-An-Idiot!
TAOTIE: So, Shifu's-An-Idiot, we meet at last... again. What are you waiting for?! Start punching him and stuff! [Walks away.]
[End of Act 2]
TAOTIE: Whiskers-Kitty-Poo, attack!
SHIFU: Wait, I don't want to hurt you.
[Tigress holds up Shifu.]
TIGRESS: I wouldn't worry about that, Shifu's-An-Idiot!
[Tigress kicks Shifu across the Hall of Warriors. He hits a column and slides to the ground. Tigress runs towards Shifu and attacks. Shifu dodges the attacking by jumping in the air. He lands in the middle of the room.]
SHIFU: Listen to me. I don't know what he told you, but I'm not your enemy!
TAOTIE: [Filing his hooves.] Preposterous! If he's not you're enemy, then why would you be attacking him?
MONKEY: Good point. Heads up, Little Britches!
MANTIS: Go get him, Doodie!
[Monkey attacks Shifu.]
CRANE: Noodles, hit him low!
[Viper hits Shifu with her tail, and then Crane kicks Shifu several times.]
VIPER: Nice move, El Storko!
[Shifu lands on the ground.]
SHIFU: [laughs] "El Storko"... that's actually pretty funny.
[The Furious Five move into a stance in front of Shifu. The scene then cuts to Po in the Corridor of Unbelievable Agony, looking at the scroll with instructions Shifu gave him.]
PO: Blah bah blah, ...unbelievable agony... heads explode... know that already. Ah, forget it! I'm gonna get that pot. [Begins walking down the corridor. He stops when he hears something move. Several paddles hit Po in the back, moving him forward. He falls.] Ah, well that wasn't so... [Looks up and sees several mechanisms start to shoot out fire.] No! [Jumps over a few of the flames and gets burned on the tail. He slides on the ground holding his tail.] Ow! Third degree! [He looks forward and sees a multitude of arrows coming at him. He runs off screen and gets hit by the arrows. When he gets back on screen there are several arrows sticking out of his butt.] That was-- bad, hurt-y. [Pulls out the arrows and yelps. He arrives at the end of the corridor and sees the Alabaster Pot sitting on a stand. He reaches for the pot, but an iron cage comes down on it, preventing him from getting it.] What?! What did I skim over? [Opens the scroll.] To unlock the cage use the key which can be found at the-- start of the corridor. [Looks down the corridor and sees the key hanging from the ceiling.] Aw man! [Runs off screen. He is heard screaming as all of the mechanisms go off. A loud thud is heard at the end.] Key! [He is heard running through the corridor again. When he comes back on screen, he is covered in soot, smoke is coming off of him, and there are arrows in his butt. He unlocks the cage and it lifts off. He grabs the pot.] Wait. [Continues reading the scroll.] Once you have the Alabaster Pot of Remembrance, use the second key to turn off the corridor's defenses. Second? [Looks down the hall, seeing another key.] Dang it!
[In the Hall of Warriors, Shifu dodges attacks from each of the five.]
TAOTIE: [Laughs.] Yes! Feel the extension of my wrath! Rue the day you insulted me with your petty accounting! Rue!
[Po arrives with the alabaster pot.]
PO: I got the Alabaster Pot of Remembrance, and a butt full of darts. [Po realizes that the five are attacking Shifu.] Guys, why are you fighting Shifu?
SHIFU: They don't know who they are.
TIGRESS: Yes we do, we're the Furious Five. Whiskers-Kitty-Poo!
MANTIS: Little Britches!
CRANE: And El Storko!
TIGRESS: And you're our arch nemeses: Shifu's-An-Idiot, and Po-Chews-With-His-Mouth-Open!
PO: [Laughs.] Shifu's an idiot. It's funny 'cause it's-- not true. [Hides his face behind the pot.]
SHIFU: Just them the remedy; get the clay on their heads!
TAOTIE: Furious Five, get that panda!
TIGRESS: Yes master Taotie.
[Tigress attacks Po. Po dodges several attacks and loses hold of the pot. The pot flies in the air and lands on Tigress head, knocking her down and covering her head with clay. Po retrieves the pot. Viper attacks Po. She lunges at him and, after several misses, she gets her head in the clay. Crane swoops toward Po and causes him to lose hold of the pot. Monkey catches the pot but quickly loses it when Shifu kicks him. The pot comes flying toward Po and Crane comes flying behind Po. Po ducks and the pot hits Crane, getting clay on his face. Po retrieves the pot and encounters Mantis. He begins fighting with him. Mantis grabs Po on the face and starts swinging him around and Po loses the pot. Po reaches for the pot and Mantis jumps to it. Po quickly covers Mantis with clay. Monkey hits Po and grabs the pot. Po bounces to a column and back at Monkey, crushing him and covering his head with clay. The clay begins to harden and cracks off of each of the fives' faces. The five all become confused but no longer mindslipped.]
MONKEY: Po, you ate my dumpling!
VIPER: You erased my memory, not nice!
CRANE: And it's your turn to sweep!
PO: Yes, yes, yes! I mean, sorry, but yes!
[Mantis walks up to Taotie.]
MANTIS: Hang on, you're not our master.
TIGRESS: You're... You.
TAOTIE: Told you they'd recognize me.
[Taotie and Bian Zao shake with fear. Po, Shifu, and the five take stances around the two. The two then run out of the palace toward the bamboo bird.]
TAOTIE: Hurry son! Faster! Come on, move it! [The two get on the bird and take off.] Peddle son, peddle! [The master arrive outside. Taotie hangs onto the bird by one arm and yells at the palace.] You may have stopped me now, but I'll be back, and I will destroy Kung Fu forever. [Laughs.] And I'm not paying that bill! [They disappear behind the clouds.]
[Later in the Dining Hall, Po tells the five about what happened.]
PO: ...And then Crane came in to tell me to sweep the barracks and I mindslipped him, and then I just got into a groove. I mean, it was just so... easy. [Chuckles.] But, I was being lazy, and I took shortcuts, and I almost lost you all. But I'm done with that now, forever.
MANTIS: How can we be sure you won't ever do the mindslip again?
PO: Oh, I've got a shortcut for that. [Mindslips himself.]
CRANE: How can we tell if it worked?
[Po stare blankly for a while and then...]
PO: Oh my gosh, the Furious Five! [Gets up.] I'm your biggest fan! Can I have your autographs?! Will you sign my belly?!
'FURIOUS FIVE: It worked.
[End of Act 3]
[End of Transcript]